Growing up, fitness was a big part of my life. At the age of 4 or 5, my mom enrolled me in Soccer and the rest was history. I played and tried a variety of sports such as soccer, basketball, softball, volleyball, track and cross country. The ones that stuck with my were soccer and track, and I even was offered a small scholarship at a community college to run track. I decided to turn down this scholarship in order to pursue blogging and other dreams that I had. After high school, I really didn’t make working out, fitness, or my health a priority. I think I was just so used to being in shape and feeling healthy, that I thought it was just second nature and would just continue to happen without any effort. I was so wrong.
Around 20 years old, I started really noticing my anxiety. This might have been something I had my entire life but I never really felt it until I stopped working out. Anxiety slowly started to become a part of my life and something I accepted rather than trying to get help with. Counseling helped a little bit but I didn’t have enough patience at the time to really find the right counselor (if you suffer from anxiety, I can’t tell you how important it is to find help and find what works for you!). I would also try and work out a little bit for another good healthy outlet, but I struggled sticking with it.
In early 2018, I had the worst panic attack of my life. I woke up in the middle of the night, my heart beating out of my chest and a weird feeling in my arm. I literally thought I was having a heart attack. The feeling was so scary and I just remember thinking I was going to pass out or die. This sounds ridiculous, but anxiety can really trick your mind into believing things that aren’t real. Luckily, my bf was able to finally calm me down but for the next couple of weeks, I had the hardest time falling asleep, I was scared the same thing would happen again.
The panic attacks eventually started to cease after reducing my caffeine intake and changing a couple of things in my routine but I realized I needed to really make a change. I was feeling tired, my body wasn’t feeling as strong as it used to, and just overall I wasn’t feeling good about myself or my lifestyle. I just remember the first week of the new year, deciding I was going to get personal training. I had been saving my money and had some extra from Christmas, and I saw that my gym was having a sale on personal training sessions!
I’ve been doing personal training now for 2 and a half months. I decided to go this route because I wanted accountability. Someone that would be checking in with me to make sure that I was doing my workouts. Plus, spending money on this, I knew I would take it more seriously or else my money would be going to waste.
Before this turns into a novel (I could go on and on), let’s finally get to the point. I just want to share my workout and fitness routine in case any of you are interested!
I have personal training sessions two days a week for 50 minutes and then three other days are also workout days and then I get two rest days. The workouts vary week to week but are a variety of weight lifting, cardio, and HIIT workouts. Sometimes I workout at home and watch workout videos on Youtube (popsugar is my favorite!) or my trainer has me do specialized workouts at the gym she made for me. I tend to get bored easily when it comes to workouts so I like having different things to do. The first month of personal training, I noticed a huge difference! I lost 8.5 inches! And overall just felt stronger and better about myself. I’ve noticed feeling more confident going to the gym and working out even with lots of guys around, this used to intimidate me a lot. lol My trainer and I get along so well too that my sessions almost feel like therapy. After I leave, I feel so good. Those endorphins are the best!!
This month, I have been focusing more on what I eat. Pasta and postmates will always been my kryptonite, but I am now making little changes to ensure I am eating more protein and vegetables, things that are beneficial for my body and health. Balance is important though! But I think I will feel even better once I start focusing on food more. The workouts and the correct food go hand in hand, it’s something I am transitioning into more.
Lately, I look forward to going to the gym more than ever and showing the guys I can workout beside them. I’m no longer afraid. It makes me feel strong. And overall, this change has made me feel stronger, more confident and proud of myself for starting something and sticking with it. Also proud of myself for making myself a priority. Putting my health at the top of my to do list and taking action.
My anxiety has been a lot better than it was too! It’s never going to go away, but it’s something I can recognize and handle. It doesn’t control who I am like it used to.
Before (photo on the left – mid January) and After (photo on the right, taken last week! mid march)
So basically, I hope this post encourages you a little bit! If you want to make a change in your life, do it. Don’t let someone else talk you out of it or put you down for making yourself a priority. Working out doesn’t mean you’re “vain” or “trying to be skinny”. I also want to emphasize that it doesn’t matter if you’re a 0 or a 16, love yourself no matter what! This is something this process has made me realize even more. Overall, focusing on your health and what makes you feel good is so important and it’s ok to do something for yourself! YOU DO YOU, WHATEVER THAT MAY BE!
WORKOUT SET IS FROM OUTDOOR VOICES – BRALETTE HERE, SHORTS HERE
SHOES ARE ADIDAS
Photos by Kiara Rose Photo
FIND ME ON INSTAGRAM! @themoptop
Hey! I have been following along for many years and just wanted to say you look great! It takes a lot of guts to post before and after photos and you should be so proud! You look strong and confident 🙂
Author
Thanks so much! I actually almost didn’t do the before and after post but it’s great to see the progress!
Thanks so much for sharing your story, Tonya! I’ve had a similar experience: I was super active as a kid and through high school, and though I’ve tried to stay active through college and after, it’s really hard to stick to! I have depression that’s been pretty tough on me the past year, but I’ve learned that when I make an effort to exercise at least a few times a week, it lightens my mood and helps me stay motivated to do other things I love as well. It’s really encouraging and inspiring to read what’s worked for you too! (And I love your cute workout set too. I need to get me some cute bicycle shorts!) ❤️
Author
Thanks for sharing this too! I have struggled with depression as well, mostly from anxiety, and working out really has helped with that as well. I am glad it has helped you too!